My dear Emiel, you are more to me than anybody (has any idea). You are the atmosphere through which I see this life. The incarnation of all lovely things. I think of you day and night, and in this night there are a lot of days and a lot of nights, that’s why every minute (every minute!) we spent together has saved my life. It's been saved in my memory and I’ll never forget a single moment of it. I fell in Love, I fell in Love for the way I love you. I fell in Love for and with your Beauty. Beauty is the wonder of wonders. A wonder is build on reality. You always tell me that you love me more than anybody, but what reality is, there is not any other boy in your life that stays like a dog. And If I left. You cry. You left the other boys for me, and only me. We have the power about each other. I’m alive and so are you! I’m alive and so are you! I can love you not only, not only, I can love you not only in my poems. Not only in this fucking letter. Let's don’t spill time, spill spurm and sweat with me. Spill love. Please Emiel,  bring me your pain and your self-forfilled love. Show me the lie. Bring me, so I bring you. So I bring you. Show me the lie. Live the lie with me. Live the lie with me in the life we both don’t want to live. Oscar wrote once that the true mystery of the world is the beauty you can see (and touch and handle).The beauty that you can destroy, and do destroy. My dear love, we will lay on the floor now, pretending dead and morbid, I will hear your tragical voice saying one more last time : “i love you” and then I will hear the blood flowing very slowly out of our veins. It's a goodbye song. I’m alive and so are you! I’m alive and so are you! 

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